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Friday, January 27, 2012

Dreaming of 2

Lately I just cannot quit thinking about having twins. Yep, I said it. I dream about it, talk about, and think about it often. In most cases people would think I'm crazy or to never wish that upon myself but I have this strong, deep desire in me that wants twins. In my days of pre-infertility I would have said no way. I could have never pictured myself with multiples or a large family. That would have always seemed overwhelming. A couple years into not knowing if we will ever have children that view has definitely changed. 
Now don't get me wrong, I'm well aware that it would be challenging. I know the first couple of years would be serious survival mode and living off no sleep, but I know several people that can and do manage. Then there is also that hurdle of my back, with the 4 rods and all... so that's kind of my main concern. Since my back doesn't really give or bend that could really put some strain on my body and/or babies in there.
So that used to scare me very badly, but now I feel like I'm so mentally ready and prepared to have any baby in me that it wouldn't even matter. I would be so overjoyed, just like my friend that is having quads!
There hasn't been a week go by when I don't say something to Marc about having twins. First he thought I was crazy, but he has over time for sure warmed up to that idea!

So maybe the next FET cycle we will get 2 out of the deal! I'm definitely praying for that and would be absolutely thrilled! My mom likes to say 1 for her and 1 for me. Ha! So I guess we will just see, for now I will continue to dream.

5 comments:

oh little leah said...

I'm praying for twins :) You will be an awesome momma and could totally handle twins!!!

Julee said...

I dreamed of that too!! It would have been wonderful but God knew I just needed one right now! :) I can't wait for this FET and praying for a positive outcome no matter 1 or 2!! ping

Carly Grace said...

I hope you have a BFP this time, no matter how many! Praying for you, Michelle!

Alana said...

I had almost convinced myself that we were going to have twins before we even had our egg retrieval! I think it would be awesome, too, so you're not the only one! Praying for you as well. Thanks for the kind words.

Michelle said...

So, I read your blog from time to time (we have mutual friends-I went to Ark). I never comment, but I just had to for this one! My husband and I have also been trying for several months unsuccessfully and the more we try the more i want twins. It's crazy. My husband would die, but I think we'd be great twin parents! Maybe we'll both get our wish someday!